Relationships

Today, I was having dinner with my girlfriend's parents. We started talking about a bar that we all knew. When they said that that was the bar where they met each other, I said "Wow, I didn't know the bar was that old". They weren't amused.

Today, I caught my boyfriend picking his nose and eating it.

Today, while searching a dating site, I came across an account of girl with the same name and info as myself. She also had the same picture. The girl was me. My life is so loveless I signed up for the same dating site twice without realizing it.

Today, I was at the gas station. My crush walked in and we started talking. I wasn't able to form words and I started to have a nervous breakdown. I started crying in a gas station in front of the guy I've liked for 7 years.

Today, I realized that my girlfriend is so addicted to the internet in general, and Facebook in particular, that I have to IM her to get her to talk to me. 

Today, my wife sent me a text 'need more money for groceries.' I left $300 in cash on the table this morning. I called to ask what she was buying that was over $300. "I needed new makeup and I found this really cute dress." I hope the dress tastes good because it was our food money for the month.